Sunday, January 11, 2015

Conversation with Mom 41

Hello Mommy,

Was just looking through this blog and thought it's been a while since I last dropped by and chatted with you. This place is good for my peace of mind. Whenever I find myself thinking of you it is here that I go to to reminisce with you of how it was when you were still around.

It's the same as usual; I still miss you as much as I did on the day you left this earth permanently. The pain is still as sharp, except I guess now I'm more used to the way it feels without you here.

It's hard not having you around. I still look at the empty chair next to me while I'm preparing meals. Still expect to hear your gentle voice whenever I'm lonely and wanting to have a conversation.

Here it is 12 days into the new year and I can't help but think of how much warmer I'd feel inside if you are still here with me.

I know I should be at peace that you've been put out of your misery now, but the heart doesn't know how not to miss you.

But enough about this gloom. I just wanted to tell you that this Saturday Along will be off to England to see Phil (yeah, they are still going strong, say a prayer for them will you Mom?). It will be just Abang, Dad and Me for a month.

We did go see you at your grave in December. We cannot make the trip back often because the car is not very fit for such a rough and long journey.

We do try to get back as often as we can, just don't be sad that it's not that often our visits to you. Just know that you are always in our thoughts.

I miss you Mommy. If you see Grey around tell her I miss her too. I like to think that she's together with you.

My two best girls.

See you around Mommy. My love to you and Grey.


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