Sunday, October 21, 2012

Remembering

Dad was in tears today thinking of Mom not being around anymore. Dad asked, "Kenapa Mommy dah tak ada? (Why Isn't Mommy around anymore?):

I felt like crying too, but I replied as calmly as I could that it was her time to go.

As daddy kept being morose and sniffling about I tried to make dad lighthearted a bit by saying, "Mom had to go first so she can set up housekeeping so when you moved on there'll be a nice comfortable house waiting for you."

While Mom wasn't much of a housekeeper she had always somehow manage to make a house a home by making it feel warm and inviting - despite the messiness.

Maybe it was just Mom's loving presence that make the home such an inviting and welcoming haven. Thinking about how empty the house now feels, it definitely was Mom's loving touch that made the difference in the friendly atmosphere that the house gets.

Mom was such a warm, loving and giving person, that being around here automatically induces one into a calm and happy mood.

Remembering Mom as she was, I can't seem to escape this heartache and the feeling of wanting to cry.

We Miss you Mom. R.I.P.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Two years and an innumerable heartbreaks later

On November 4th 2012 at 11.48pm,  it will be exactly two years since Mom passed away. Nearing her anniversary, I find myself thinking about her more frequently than I've been doing this past year.

It's not that all these while I don't think of her, because I do, it's just that lately thoughts of her has been consuming my mind a lot.

These November is also the two years anniversary of my aunt and my friend's grandfather's passing.
They died two days before Mom did.

I mentioned to my friend in a mail on FB the other day that it's almost two years since our loved ones had moved on and she replied saying "yes can you believe how time flies".

Time has flown indeed and I am now about to honour Mom's two years of going home to the Almighty.

I hope she is faring well in the after life. I hope she can still feel the love we still carry for her in our hearts.

I don't have a poem or anything remotely poetic to say about Mom's passing -all I have are these thoughts and I hope it reaches her somehow:

"Mom, I am trying to be a wonderful person whom you would be proud of and trying to live a full life in honor of the spectacular one you had lived. I carry within me, 24/7, 365 and every where I go, the love you left inside my heart and I will cherish and treasure each memory I have of you and one day should I be blessed with a family of my own I will share my memories of you with them and though you weren't blessed with grandkids while you were alive, I will, if Allah willing and I have my own offspring, make them love you as if you were here still to share your love on them... such was the power and beauty of your loving heart that I'm sure I won't have any problems allowing your loving nature to transcends death.

On this day, 26 days before your anniversary, I celebrate the bountiful life you lived and the joy of your love that you shared with those who knew you best.

I love, cherish and honour you.

God willing, one day we'll be together again and this pain in my heart will turn to rejoicing when our souls will greet each other on the same plain once again.

Till then, R.I.P Mom."